Tourniquet
by ExoticPeachBlossom
Summary: A song-fic based off the song of the same name by Evanescence.


Tourniquet

Elphaba stormed into her empty dorm room, tears cascading down her face, glistening like crystal stars in the heavenly sea of the night. Her long raven hair billowed wildly behind her; slight wisps of a ghost's feather, lithely dancing in the haunting breeze.

She was tired of the pain, of the torments of her life. Enraged, she whips around and grasping the door, slams it shut with a thunderous roar.

Her heart thundered in her chest, and blood pounded violently behind her ears. Her breathes came out hard, and gasping, and the world spun violently before her red rimmed eyes.

Clenching her eyes closed, she heaved a sigh, before collapsing against the door. Weakly, she bowed her head, and let the tears she had been fighting for so long, to fall one by one, down her slender cheeks.

One word, one thought kept crashing like waves of thunder within her aching skull; when would the world, when would _life _be done with her? Hadn't she suffered enough? Hadn't the world, had enough in tormenting her? When would the holy Grim Reaper finally appear before her, swing his mighty Scythe, and cut down her life, releasing her from her imprisonment, from her bondage, from her pain?

The memories of the past and present crashed hard into her mind, shattering what was left of her barriers. Stiffening, Elphaba tilted her head heavenwards, releasing the echoes of her pain, long since buried, hidden deep within the silken folds of her fractured soul.

She wanted to be done, to fall into oblivion and be lost forever in its sweet serenade. Slip through the cracks of darkness, and fall forever into sweet bliss, to a land of eternal peace and happiness.

Weakly, Elphaba's head lowered, and her eyes softened. Tears shimmered in her eyes as she stared vacantly at her wrist. Her fingers trembled, as they slowly pulled down the cuff of her jacket, revealing hidden track marks long since hidden from the eyes of the world.

Her scars, her silent screams of pain, of her agony.

A growl vibrated deep within her throat. Slamming her eyes shut, she clenched her hands into quivering fists, and raised them high in the air. Another bellowing scream tore through her throat as she pounded her skull in time with the thundering drum beat of her misery. The pain didn't matter, for an icy numbness had washed over her broken body, leaving her hollow and empty inside.

_I love your hair…_

Elphaba's eyes snapped open, and her fists froze in midair. The breath slipped from her quivering lips, leaving her breathless and trembling.

_So beautiful…_

Weakly, her fingers loosened and fell to her head. Slowly, her fingers threaded into the sea of raven silk and satin. The feel; though soothing at times, brought an irrevocable wave of pain, to crash against her heart, cracking and splintering it all the more.

_So soft…like silk…_

A scream from somewhere hidden within the darkened recesses of her soul echoed loud around her. It took her but a moment, to realize the scream had come from her.

Blinded by her rage, she tore at her hair, tearing handfuls of raven strands from her head. Light splatters of blood stained her fingertips with each violent yank, and yet she didn't care, for she was too far gone to notice, or take heed.

Piece by piece, the strands of raven silk fell like delicate snowflakes, landing and curling on the cold, wooden planks beneath her.

Soon, a river of ebony surrounded her. Blindly, her trembling fingers reached towards the floorboards, the tips, lithely brushing past each strand, making it dance and sway in the capsizing breeze.

_Elphie!_

A gasp and Elphaba tilts her head towards the sky. Her heart pounds hard like a jackhammer in her chest. Tears, prickle at the sides of her eyes, and yet she refused to let them fall.

_Elphie….my Elphie…I love you…_

Crying out in pain, Elphaba's hands rose and clasped hard against the side of her head. Small tangles of raven tresses twirl around each individual finger, tickling her knuckles and her wrists.

_Elphie…_

"No" whimpers Elphaba weakly, her voice trembling through the pain.

_Promise me…_

"Leave me alone!" cries Elphaba, her voice rising in near hysterics with each hard down beat of her heart.

_That we'll always be together…_

A flash of pink and a twirl of gold, and Elphaba's sanity shatter. Screaming, Elphaba jumps to her feet, a howl of a scream, tearing free from her throat, leaving it raw, and bloody.

_I tried to kill the pain!_

Wildly, Elphaba marched into the bathroom, her magick pulsed thick within her veins, small emerald and black sparks of magick danced at the tip of her fingertips.

The lights flickered once, before flipping on one by one as she stepped past.

Heading to the sink, Elphaba slams her knuckles down hard on the porcelain countertop, splitting the skin between each finger.

_My Elphie…_

Slowly, Elphaba lifts her head up, until her dark, soulless eyes stare like crystal glass back at the mirror, at her reflection.

A dark shadow fell over her face, marring her appearance, warping it, to the _distortion_, the abomination she knew laid hidden beneath.

_My beautiful Elphie…_

Her body trembled, and her hands shook, tears crested at the edge of her eyes and her face paled. A scream and her fist goes through the mirror, shattering it.

Her eyes watch taciturnly, as the fractured pieces of glass stained in blood fall one by one to the sink below, shattering, into small, crystal shards; small pieces of her reflection, mirroring back at her.

_Stay with me…love me…and never let me go…_

Languorously, she reached for the broken shards, glistening before her eyes. Her fingers curl and tighten around one, and squeezing it tight, brings it up closer to her face.

Pearls of crimson dripped down the palm of her hand, twisting around her wrist, and trailing down an invisible pathway down her arm, and for a moment, the drop wavered, before dripping off the knob of her elbow and splattering to the floor.

For a moment, Elphaba stared at the splatter of blood, her heart raced and her mind reeled. Could she really do this again? Could she really travel down this treacherous passageway?

_Do it…no one would care…_

A gasp and Elphaba's head snaps up to the mirror. Her eyes widen, seeing the image of her mother, appear before her, a wicked, gruesome smile painted on her blood red lips.

Seeing her mother was enough, but her appearance, shocked her to her very core, for instead of her peach colored skin, her mother appeared pale, and decayed. Her eyes were sunken deep into her skull, and her long, chestnut hair fell in tangles around her bone thin shoulders. The dress; a once elegant violet, now was pale and worn, pieces of cloth had been ripped away, and it hung loose around her skeleton thin frame.

"M…mama?" whispers Elphaba

_Ah…my beautiful disaster…so good to see you again_

"Your…what?" whispers Elphaba.

_You heard me! Or does the green affect your hearing as well! You were a mistake! A solecism! An abomination that should never have been born!_

"No…no you don't mean it" cries Elphaba. Tears pour from her eyes and yet she didn't care. Desperately, Elphaba slams her fists down on the countertop, slicing the delicate skin on the tops of her hands and fingers.

_I should have drowned you the moment you were born! All you bring is destruction! Chaos! You're a freak! An aberration! An impurity that should have been eradicated the moment you left my womb!_

"No! No Mama please?!" cries Elphaba. Crying out, Elphaba slams her blood stained hands against the mirror.

_You only bring death and destruction to all who meet you…to all who grace your presents! It's because of you that I died! That your sister cannot walk!_

"No…please…stop" whimpers Elphaba. Weakly, her hands slip down the mirror, leaving behind a smear of blood.

_End the suffering of others…and end your pathetic life…unless…_

"Unless?" sniffles Elphaba. Slowly, she lifts her head up from the counter. A small stream of blood trails down her forehead, splitting at her nose, and cresting at her chin.

_You're too…weak…too afraid to man up and take hold of the hand of justice…and end the suffering of others_

"I'm not weak" growls Elphaba darkly.

_Prove it_

A scream and Elphaba plunges the shard deep into her wrist.

_But only brought more!_

"Glinda…what happened!" roars Fiyero.

"I don't know!" cries Glinda.

The two walked quickly down the hallway, each with fear quaking deep in their hearts, for neither knew of what had transpired, only that Elphaba had ran out of the cafeteria, in tears, a roar of laughter, following behind her.

"What do you mean you don't know? Ozdamnit Glinda you were supposed to be her friend! You were supposed to protect Fae!" roars Fiyero.

"I swear…I only turned my back for a moment!" cries Glinda.

That part was true, for after she and Glinda had entered the cafeteria and taken their seats, did she leave; offering to grab lunch for the both of them, leaving Elphaba alone.

To her, it seemed it had only been a few minutes, when in reality, it had taken much longer. One of her so called "friends" had bounded up to her, and started a conversation regarding the latest fashion trends and what matches with what, leaving the blonde completely oblivious to the chaos behind her.

Seeing their chance, Pfannee, ShenShen, Millie and a handful of other students crept up behind Elphaba, questioning her regarding her "friendship" with the blonde and the Vinkun Prince.

"You know that Glinda and Fiyero only _befriended _you out of pity right?" asks ShenShen.

"You didn't!" gasps Pfannee after hearing only silence come from Elphaba. "Why it's so _painfully _obvious…even an idiot could see that!"

"You honestly believed they like you?" continues ShenShen, after a moment of silence. "They were only using you…to help boost up their grades…and getting "closer" together"

A gasp, and Elphaba's head rises and her eyes widen. No, no it couldn't be true. Glinda loved her she said so herself…and Fiyero…

"Oh my Oz! The Artichoke actually believed Miss Glinda cared for her! Oh and here I thought _you_ were the smartified one!" laughs Millie.

"She was only using you…she wanted to get closer to Fiyero so she used her "friendship" and your "other" experimentations in order to get closer to the Prince" smiles Pfannee wickedly.

"I overheard Miss Glinda one day telling a friend…how much she detested holding your hand…or even touching you…she said she struggles to keep from grimacing any time you touch her…and when she's alone…she goes and takes a hot shower in order to scrub off the feel of _you _on her skin" smirks another girl with long blonde hair, pulled back in numerous braids.

_So much more!_

A scream and Elphaba rips the shard hard across her wrist, mutilating her flesh. Large rivulets of blood spill from her torn skin, and yet she didn't care. All she wanted, all she desired, was for the pain to finally go away.

And yet with each cut, with each slice, with each shred of her flesh, with each drop of her blood, the pain only increased, blinding her, stealing her breath, and shattering what remained of her soul.

_I lay dying!_

Her legs buckle beneath her. A tip and she collapses to the ground of broken shards and dreams, of heartache and sorrow. The glass, cuts and slices into her skin, spilling more of her blood upon the floor.

_And I'm pouring…crimson regret!_

"M…Mama!" cries Elphaba weakly.

_Shhhh my freak…it will be alright…_

Weakly, her eyes fluttered closed, feeling her life, her energy, her salvation spill out from her weakened body; all her regret, all her pain, slipping, draining away into a river of blood.

"And when she's kissing you" gasps ShenShen. "Oh the poor thing…she told me she has to imagine she's kissing Fiyero just to keep herself from throwing up"

"No" whispers Elphaba.

"And don't get me started on the Prince!" gasps Pfannee mockingly.

"Oh Fiyero…he told me that he had made a bet with Avaric and the other male students" laughs Millie in a shrilling tone.

"A…a bet?" croaks Elphaba, straightening.

"Oh you didn't know?" asks Millie in an innocent tone.

"What…what bet?" asks Elphaba licking her lips.

"That he would get into your pants before Miss Glinda did!" chortles Pfannee.

"And he even videotaped it too…showed it to all of us! Man…he really is a good actor! He almost had me fooled!" laughs ShenShen.

"Video…taped" chokes out Elphaba.

"Yes…Miss Glinda was the one who actually did it…she stood outside your dorm room and taped the whole thing. She had to turn away a couple of times and vomit at how absolutely digustified it was…seeing you naked and all" smirks Millie.

_I'm dying!_

Weakly, Elphaba clenches her trembling fists, in the bowl of her lap. Her heart races and her mind reels. No, no there was no way that Glinda and Fiyero would do such a dastardly thing.

A loud moaning sound soon ripped her out of her thoughts.

_Praying!_

The students around her turn and laugh. A few make gagging noises, a few actually throw up. Slowly, Elphaba turns, her heart hammering hard in her chest.

_Bleeding!_

"Fiyero!" screams Elphaba before plunging the shard deep into her other wrist.

_And screaming!_

"Noooooooooooooooooooooooo!" Violently, Elphaba jerks the shard up her arm, slicing the skin up to the knob of her elbow with such force, that blood sprays against the walls, the mirror, the countertops, her clothes and her face.

"Oh…Fae" moans Fiyero.

Elphaba's eyes widen, and her mouth drops open. Her heart stops, and twists tight in her chest at the scene playing out before her.

_Am I too lost…to be saved?_

A video, projected high on the wall, of her and Fiyero, making love.

_Am I too lost?_

Smirking, ShenShen leans in close, and rests her arm over Elphaba's shoulder.

"He's a great actor…isn't he?"

_My God! My Tourniquet!_

"Who in Oz videotaped that!?" snarls Fiyero, his dark sapphire eyes glaring down at the blonde, running beside him.

"How should I know?" snaps Glinda, turning to glare back at the Prince.

"You were the only one who knew about that night!"

"I…I" stammers Glinda slowing a bit.

"Glinda!" roars Fiyero. Stopping, he reaches out and grabs hard onto Glinda's shoulders, stilling her. "What. Did. You. Do?"

"I…may have told my friends?"

"WHAT!?" roars Fiyero.

_Return to me Salvation!_

"Glinda!...Why in Oz would you tell your friends!?"

"Why wouldn't I?" snaps Glinda.

"Because _there_ yourfriends Glinda! Oz sometimes I wonder if you actually have a brain in that thick skull of yours!"

"They were asking me questions! What do you expect me to do?" cries Glinda.

_My God! My Tourniquet!_

"To be smart enough to know to keep your Ozdamn mouth shut!" snarls Fiyero.

"I can't do that!"

"Yes you can…you just _choose _not to" growls Fiyero. "You just can't give up on your false popularity can you?…the mindless bravado those mindless sheep out fill your empty little head with! Can you!? Can you!? You can't live without the mask? Without the façade of love and adoration those so called _friends _shower you with…Oz…you're really blinded by them aren't you?"

_Return to me Salvation!_

"Fiyero" whimpers Glinda.

"And because of _you_ Elphaba…my Fae…may be fighting for her life!" snarls Fiyero, interrupting the blonde's lame excuse. "I thought you loved her Glin…as I do?"

_Do you remember me?_

Weakly, Elphaba's head tilts towards the door, the shard stained in blood, falls and clatters to the ground. An icy numbness, a chill, slowly crept over her body, and she relished the feel.

_Lost for so long…_

"I" starts Glinda.

"She's lost Glinda…alone! She's had no one by her side to love her…to care for her! You know how long it took for her to just let you in…and me! And now because of your stupidity! I may lose the one woman who I wanted to spend forever with!"

"Mama" whispers Elphaba weakly.

_Will you be on the other side?_

"Hey" came a voice. Startled, both Fiyero and Glinda turn to see a girl with light brown hair and honey hazel eyes stand but a few feet away. "You room with the green girl right?"

"Her names Elphaba! Repeat after me E.L.P.H.A.B.A!" snarls Glinda.

"Okay…you better get to your room…my roommate and I heard a lot of screaming and things breaking in there" replies the girl timidly.

"Oh Oz" gasps Fiyero.

_Or will you forget me?_

Elphaba had had enough. Rising to her feet, and keeping her head lowered, she turned and sprinted out of the cafeteria, a thundering wave of laughter following closely on her heels.

_I'm dying!_

She could feel it, her life, slowly slipping away. A calm, serene smile tugged along the edge of her lips. Finally, she would find peace. A way out of this madness called life.

_Praying!_

"ELPHIE!" screams Glinda as she rams into the door.

"FAE!"

_Bleeding…and screaming!_

Weakly, Elphaba's eyes fluttered open. Did she? No, no it was impossible. She was alone…for nobody cared, nor loved a freak like her. She was born alone…and she would die alone…forever lost, forbidden to touch the Light.

_Am I too lost…to be saved?_

"Look out!" snarls Fiyero. Glinda turning covers her ears as Fiyero kicks open the door. Small pieces of wood fly everywhere.

Both turn and peer inside.

_My God! My Tourniquet!_

_Return to Me Salvation!_

"Fae!" screams Fiyero as he stumbles into the empty room.

_My God! My Tourniquet!_

_Return to me Salvation!_

"Where is she?" whispers Glinda softly.

A bell of a chime of glass from the bathroom captures their attention. For a moment, the two stare back at each other, before turning and bolting to towards the bathroom door.

Reaching the door first, Fiyero throws it open and gasps.

_Return to me Salvation!_

Falling to his knees Fiyero slides on blades of glass towards Elphaba's limp form, lying dead and pale in a sea of glass and blood. Gently, ever so gently, he lifts her up and cradles her broken body in his arms.

"Why Fae?" whispers Fiyero through his tears. Gently, his hand rises and cups her blood stained cheek.

"I" stammers Elphaba weakly.

"What…what is it my love?" whispers Fiyero, his voice cracking.

"I…"

_I WANT TO DIE!_

"Fae…no!"

_My God! My Tourniquet!_

"Elphie no…please" cries Glinda. Slowly, weakly, the petite blonde stumbles towards her fallen friend.

Her legs buckle and give beneath her. A cry of pain and Glinda collapses to the floor. Bubbles of tears shimmer in her large cerulean eyes as she stares back, wounded, and broken before her friend.

_Return to Me Salvation!_

A choked gasp and Elphaba weakly lifts her head towards the ceiling. The life the warmth in her eyes slowly fades away. She didn't have much time, before Death claimed her soul._  
My God! My Tourniquet!_

"I'm…I'm sorry" whispers Elphaba softly; a ghost of a whisper to the whistling breeze, sweeping lithely within the large room.

"What?" gasps Fiyero.

"Elphie…what in Oz are you apologizing for?" cries Glinda.

_Return to me Salvation!_

"I'm sorry…for…for"

"Fae?" whispers Fiyero.

Weakly, Elphaba's eyes drift down to her mutilated wrist, and for a moment, she stared, watching the stifling blood flow, slowly spill to the ground below.

Her wounds, her salvation, her one release from the pain.

_My wounds…cry for the grave!_

A soft, whispered sigh, slipped through the jagged cracks of Elphaba's pale lips. Finally, at last, she would have peace, real peace…

_My soul cries! For Deliverance!_

"Elphie?" whispers Glinda. Gently, ever so gently, Glinda' reaches for Elphaba's cheek. The tips of her fingers glide across her pale, emerald flesh and she gasps.

Startled, she pulls back, her eyes widen and her heart twists hard in her chest. So cold…like ice…

_Will be denied?_

"Elphie please don't go! You have to…you have to keep your eyes open and" wildly, Glinda's eyes flew around the room, searching for something…anything to use to stifle the blood flow. "And…I'll use this towel to staunch the blood…FiFi…you carry Elphie and we'll bring her to the Infirmary"

"Glin" croaks out Elphaba weakly.

"Come on Fiyero let's go! We don't have much time!" cries Glinda. Fiyero could see it, and so could Elphaba. She was near hysterics.

Grimacing, Elphaba weakly lifted her pale, quivering fingers up, and rested them against Glinda's bare shoulder. A shudder, and Glinda stiffens, and turns, her eyes widen and her lips part. Tears cascade like dew drops down her face, sparkling and catching the light of the evening dawn.

"Let…me…go" whispers Elphaba weakly.

"What? No…No Elphie…not now or ever!" cries Glinda.

_Christ! Tourniquet!_

"I…I can't Glin…I can't…I'm not…strong…enough…not anymore…ta…take care…of…Fiyero…be happy…together….you two….deserve…each…other"

"Elphie" cries Glinda.

_My suicide!_

A flutter of long black lashes, and Elphaba's eyes close, her body stills, a wisp of air, and all goes silent.

"Elphie…Elphie…ELPHIE!" screams Glinda.

_The world here at Shiz University was thrown into chaos. A few hours ago, three bodies were found dead in the bathroom of one of the girls dormitories. Their identities have yet to be identified._

_The bodies of three Shiz students have been identified as Miss Elphaba Thropp, the eldest daughter to the Governor of Munchkinland, Frexspar Thropp, Glinda Arduenna Upland, daughter to the Duke and Duchess of Pertha Hills, and Fiyero Liir Tiggular, the son and only heir to the throne of the Vinkus._

_Days after the three suicides, three students here on campus have been charged in their deaths. More details are coming in on how the three had bullied and tormented Miss Elphaba Thropp, the late Governor of Munchkinland's daughter which drove her to take her own life._

_This just in…in a startling revelation, the three students, now identified as Miss ShenShen Perth of the Glikkus, Pfannee Arluenna of Restwater and Millie Deverouix of Gillikin. All three are the children of three of the most prominent families here in Oz._

_A fourth has now been connected with the deaths/suicides of Miss Elphaba Melena Thropp, Glinda Arduenna Upland and Fiyero Tiggular. Astonishing enough, this gentleman came forward on his own. A Master Avaric Tenmeadows, future Margreaves, overcome with guilt, went to the Gale force and confessed in involvement in the prank, which led to Miss Elphaba's suicide, and the deaths of Glinda and Fiyero._

Alone on a hill, Boq and Nessa stand, staring in silence at three headstones, half illuminated by the sun's setting rays. A chill of a breeze sweeps past them, lifting and tangling a few strands of Nessa's long, chestnut hair to dance and flitter in the breeze. A single rose, painted in green, rests in her lap.

"We should go back" replies Boq softly.

Nodding, Nessa takes the rose, and bringing it up to her nose, sniffs it before placing it at the foot of one of the graves. Saying one last silent goodbye, she turns and wheels herself down the hill.

Boq remains, staring at the tombstones. A small, weak smile pulls at the edge of his lips. Slowly, he pulls out a newspaper, and stepping closer, rests it against the cold stone of the one's lost but not forgotten.

_Return to me salvation…_

"You're free" whispers Boq. Turning, he gives one last glance at the stones, before turning and walking away.

A whistling breeze wisps by, shuffling the paper, and making it crinkle. The air stills, the last of the suns golden rays flicker across the paper, illuminating the headlines.

**Justice**


End file.
